Things at work are as crazy as ever. Lost another coworker today but I also am getting more hours so I cant complain too much. I am thinking more about my kids now than anything. Which is what I'm supposed to do right... I dont want them to have to suffer the way that I did. I know they are going to have to walk their own path. And I know all my daughters are going to have their heart broken probably more than once. Dont take others for granted. Dont let others take advantage of you. I hope they learn to love themselves and to pray for those that take advantage of that love. Stay strong my children and know that I love you very very very much. This is my testament to you. I will add as much of my thoughts and poetry to these blogs as I can hoping that one day you can say "I know my Daddy". I love you Kayla, Timothy, Morgan, Nala, and Mia!!
Loneliness doesnt begin to describe what I am feeling these days. I hate coming home alone and for the vast majority of the time since December 6, 2001 thats exactly what I have been doing. I am giving up hope in having a normal family life. It seems to be so far fetched and theres does not seem to be a remedy or solution in sight. Im stuck between a rock a hard place as I realize that my kids are probably better without me and Im not going to find my one true love. Oh well....
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